Art Saves {and Leaves a Legacy} • by Mindy Tsonas

Today, in those wispy early morning moments, in that place between sleep and wakefulness, I laid in bed thinking about my nana. Even though she’s been gone for quite some time now — almost 14 years — I felt a fresh ache from her absence. I wandered through thoughts of all the things I would love to tell her, the exciting and beautiful things I know she would have beamed over, and thought wistfully about the moments we never got to share together, like my wedding day and the birth of my children. I can easily imagine the doting and adoring great grandmother she would have been.

She was such an important part of my life. She is the reason I knew, even as a girl, that I would never move far from my parents — I wanted to give my own children the same experience that she gave to me growing up. From her (and my papa too), I understood the unique magic of that unwavering, overflowing, and unconditional love you could only get from a grandparent. I miss that, even as a grown woman. I miss her. I hope to be that kind of nana someday. Often I find myself mentioning her to my children, capturing a memory and trying to find a way to bring her into the present to share her with them. But she is here. Everywhere I look. She is with me.

An Inspired Love
My nana inspired the love of so many things in me — thrifting, crafting, cooking — and I know my creative “genes” come in many ways from her. Even though I’m adopted and we don’t share the same blood, she shared her heart with me and thus her essence will forever be a part of who I am. In spending time with her through the years I saw love as a simple equation: a fierce devotion to family and friends that was whipped up into pies, knitted into sweaters, baked into steaming savory dishes, and shared and treasured like small thrifted gems found at her favorite shop. I love that I still have some of these special pieces of her and most of all the memories that stay along with them. She always was making something for someone, and it enthralled me to watch her busy with her work. I didn’t know then, but I realize now what I saw. 

What I was learning was that with every stitch and every ingredient she was putting together, she was offering a piece of herself. She was creating from love. I remember this look of quiet joy and pride she got when she completed a project, and how with great care she picked out the final finishing touch … red heart-shaped buttons, a beautiful wooden frame, a dusting of sugar and cinnamon, or other little things that would convey how much she really cared. It wasn’t ever really about what she had made, it was about what this handcrafted and heartfelt gift meant … what you meant to her.

Art = Love
In those awful days when she was sick and dying of cancer, I can remember writing her sappy poetic heart songs, making her little cards and things hoping to make her smile and feel less afraid and sad. It was what she taught me to do. I willed her to get better through creating these simple expressions of love. And though I couldn’t save her life I see now how her life has saved mine, over and over again.

My nana showed me how to love through creating; what was once her way is now my way, and it has imprinted onto my life this indelible legacy. I know someday my kids (and hopefully grandkids) as well as others I care about will see this too. How the times when I created with them and for them, that all along it was really my heart wrapped up in paint, paper, fabric, and bows. For me, like my nana, art = love. And love is everything after all.

Mindy Tsonas is the creative editor and hostess of inthewishstudio.blogspot.com. Learn more about her at her personal blog, underapinksky.blogspot.com, or contact her at wishstudio@comcast.net.

Comments

[cheryl Moran]

Your comments about your nana are the very thoughts that I have had through the years about mine. It is as if you took everything I felt and put it into words. We were very blessed to have had such a special women in our lives.

[Jodi Ohl]

What a heartfelt story, Mindy. It brought tears to my eyes as I could have written the same about my dear Nana....what a blessing to have that unconditional love of a grandparent.

[Carmen Torbus]

Mindy, I'm so excited to be featured along with you this week. I've been meaning to reach out to you via Wish Studio, I am just so inspired by what you've got going on over there and I would love to get involved somehow!

So inspired by you,

Carmen

[linda]

What a touching story...and it's so true that the legacy and intention...the love - that lives on forever.

[mindy]

cheryl, jodi, carmen and linda... thank you all for your sweet and heartfelt words. isn't it amazing how deeply we touch each other's lives? we all will leave some kind of legacy!

[shona cole]

oh how lovely to read this. I love how your nana has inspired you to want to stay close to your parents and to be hand on those strong family ties to your family. When the family is strong the society is strong. thank you for this lovely insight into your life!

[Cindy Jones Lantier]

mindy, I was so touched to read your thoughts and memories of your nana. In fact, I'm a little choked up, and there are tears in my eyes. How lucky you were to have such an amazing experience of this remarkable woman. I worried when I moved away from my parents, because I wanted that relationship between them and my children. As it turned out, there were no children, but that's another story. Again, thanks so much for sharing. It was lovely to read.

[mindy]

shona, thanks so much for that lovely insight {hugs}. cindy, your heartfelt words mean so much...thanks so much for reaching out and sharing them with me. xo