Art Saves: My Story • by Kathy Cano-Murillo (The Crafty Chica)

Stream of Consciousness
Okay, I’m going to be honest.

I’m writing this in 100% stream of consciousness format. That is so unlike me. As a writer, I like to throw out a draft and then edit it into submission. Could be because I just came off of six months of intense novel writing and editing. My spirit is telling me to freestyle this essay and allowing my instinct to create an impromptu word collage of thoughts and sentences!

Now that we have that out of the way, let’s get back to ART SAVES.

When I first received the invitation to share my personal of story of how art has saved me, I thought – “Oh! Easy! I could write that with my eyes closed!” The cutesy tagline on my bio about being a “left-handed middle child Sagittarian” popped in my head. Next I pondered about how making art can change the world one color shade at a time.

None of that is what it making my heart pump at this moment. Bottom line?

Art is my selfish habit. It’s how I get my secret fix of happy.

Biodiesel
Sure family, career, health - all of those are my foundation of smiles and gratitude. But making things is my way to deal with stress, hurt, insecurity, and sadness. Whether it’s sewing, painting, gluing or sketching – I’m able to take the things that make me freak out challenges and transform them into love, empowerment, ambition, and hope…Kinda of like those environmentalists who turn leftover cooking grease into biodiesel fuel. I guess I’m saying art is my processing plant of emotions? As in too much grimy grease will kill me, but clean fuel (creativity) will take me to places both real and surreal. Sometimes it’s the opposite. I’m on so much of a rush that I need to create or write something to take the edge off.

After I get it all out of my system, I put it out for all to see, read, hear or experience. I feel like it’s my mission to do this kind of filtering and infuse some high-octane happy out in the world to balance out the negative. Inspiring other people to do the same is a wonderful by-product.

I have a recent specific example.

My Dad Passed Away
Last July, my dad passed away. He was so happy the night before, joking with us kids, looking forward to going home the next day…we never imagined it would be the last time we would kiss him on the cheek and he’d kiss us back. He passed in his sleep early the next morning, very peaceful and dignified.

The rest of the day was numbing because we had to deal with the shock and grief, and attend all kinds of meetings for the funeral arrangements. It was July, 115 degrees, all of us in one car, food to order for a hundred people, prayer cards to choose, etc. My sister and I decided to make memory collage posters boards for the next day’s service. My sister and I ended the long afternoon in a shouting match. I jumped out of her car and stomped for a mile down Dunlap Avenue. I felt my shoes literally melt on the sidewalk as I walked, that’s how hot it was outside. I had on thin flip-flops because when we got the call at 5:30 a.m. to go to the hospital, they were the closest footwear by the phone.

Anyway, I finally called my husband to pick me up. I was determined to make those boards by myself. The problem was, I had all the fancy supplies and embellishments - and my sister had all the pictures. As soon as I realized this, I dropped my head in my hands and sobbed. I seriously could not imagine making it through the night after all I’d been through that day.

Cranked up Fleet Foxes
My sister and I finally calmed down and made up within the hour. We knew we had to pull it together for my dad. She came over, we hugged it out, cranked up the Fleet Foxes and looked through all the pictures of my dad, chose our favorites and scanned them in. I worked on those boards all night with all my heart and soul. It was the most important, meaningful art project of my life. It was the most healing and therapeutic turning point of my life.

The next morning, I admired the boards and I felt stronger… like, if I took it hour-by-hour I’d be okay. We put the memory boards up at his service and later in the night when I walked by them, I noticed how bright and happy they looked. Just like my dad’s personality.

I added this example because tonight as I began to write this, I heard my dad say “Kathy!” and I jumped in my seat! My dad was an artist and crafter of many trades, and I think he wanted to be a part of this article. Plus, he always used to tell me “Back up an idea with a specific example!” - so I took it as a sign from him to use the memory boards as just that.

Learn more about The Crafty Chica at thecraftychica.blogspot.com.

Comments

[linda]

What a wonderful piece of consciousness...hehe...thanks for sharing your story. It's in the most desperate times that I think we all suddenly realize how much Art saves...

[Melissa Bolton]

So sorry about your dad. This was a great story...and a super fun picture of you! Thanks for sharing.

[Colette]

A really truly good story, girlita!

xox

[kelly]

That was lovely, and powerful, and inspiring, all at the same time. Creating is like that for me, not a choice but an outlet, a way to work through life, ponder my purpose, open my eyes.

[Alyice Edrich]

That was so touching. Gave me goosebumps. Your dad sounds like an amazing man, he would be honored at your homage to him. Powerful, too, about what grief can do to people. I lost my mom a few years back and I only wish my sister and I could have come together the way you and yours did.

[carissa]

Chica! i really enjoyed reading this touching story. how cool that your dad helped you write it ;) he sounds like a special man. of course he is! my friend has your book on her blog as a giveaway. she really enjoyed it and i'm sure i will too!

keep kickin it freestyle ;P
xxx

[Ellen]

It is wonderful how much of an impact your Dad had on your life.
I love that he found a way to remind, you one more time. Your art, impacts others. Sorry to hear about your Dad, but he is
still touching you in various ways, now. He will visit you again, through your art~

[Christine]

It's been a joy to read your post and links this week Cathy! What a wonderful nurturing father you had..sounds like his spirit is still there to guide you:)
Thank you for mentioning my Frida dolls and for featuring so many creative women, especially Latina artists (two from Bend, Oregon!). Continued success to you:)