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12/25/2011


Metamorphosis • by Stephanie Jones Rubiano


Stephanie Jones RubianoA feeling of incredulity settled over me on a December evening in 2005 when I realized that Jenny Doh, editor of Somerset Studio magazine, was calling me personally to ask if I would be interested in writing an article for the magazine. I had sent in photos of my butterfly boxes to answer the call for artwork for a ‘Wings and Things’ theme and evidently my creations had merited a phone call. I had just been through a truly awful six months as my marriage of seven years disintegrated due to my husband's repeated infidelity. I agreed to do the article. My husband and I separated that following January and I remember sitting at my brother's house here in Austin, trying to write the article that was due in February. I felt overwhelmed and I almost gave up because it seemed that everything in my life was falling apart and that I couldn’t possibly concentrate and write the thing. Finally, it came to me that the article was something I could do and be proud of...writing about what I loved to create and sharing that with fellow artists and aficionados. It was something that I could control when everything else was spinning out. I completed the article and sent it in. When I received the advance copy of the magazine and saw my artwork on the cover, I began to have a glimmer of what my future could hold...

Besides my daughter, the artwork I was making during my separation and subsequent divorce was one of the few things that got me out of bed in the mornings. I drew strength from the creative process and learned that it was something that could help shape my future. Many people suggested I make pieces and destroy them to work through the pain and anger, but that never appealed to me. Just creating pieces that made me smile and being able to focus on something positive made all the difference. I remember that I had to make the conscious decision to work through everything and become the person I knew I could be or remain stuck in a never-ending cycle of bitterness and anger. I love the life I have now. My daughter is amazing and I am married to an incredible man who supports all of my artistic endeavors. With his love and support, along with that of my friends and family, I feel that I am finally coming into my own. I feel stronger and surer of myself. I am a full-time, working artist. The entire creative process is extremely empowering. My daughter looks up to me and is very proud of my work. I can say the same about her...so proud as she grows into a strong and self-confident little girl. Perhaps my first marriage was akin to a pupal stage where I had cocooned myself in layers of what and who I wasn't and my divorce was the emergence from this cocoon. I think I am ready to spread my wings and fly...

To learn more about Stephanie Jones Rubiano, visit stephanierubiano.com.

Comments

You are an amazing artist Stephanie I loved reading all about you.You have indeed come out of that cocoon and turned into a gorgeous butterfly.

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